I love spicy food. The hotter, the better. In fact, if the food does not make me sweat, I would not consider it spicy.

When I go eat spicy food (I mean really spicy food) I ask for plastic gloves. The look the server gives me is not one of confusion. The look is always understanding. Almost like the server thinks, “This guy knows how to eat spicy food.”

Let's face it, when I eat spicy food without plastic gloves, I am merely setting myself up for disaster. The heat transfers to my hands, then to my nose/eyes/cheeks/bald head/wife. This is not a road I want to travel.

When I wear plastic gloves, I am less likely to touch anything. Almost as if I am a crime scene inspector, and the food is a dead body… okay… bad analogy. But, the fact remains: when I wear plastic gloves, I refrain from touching bare skin, including my own.

Does this make me a spicy food connoisseur? I like to think so, but I bet many of you would disagree. To that I say, "I challenge you to a duel (of spicy food eating)." No, I do not plan on slapping you in the face with a leather glove (or plasitic one), but we really should sit down and enjoy some spicy food together. Korean, Mexican, Thai, BBQ, Indian... It's does not matter. I enjoy it all. I'll even go meatless (if that's your thing).

The bottom line is this: I like food, you like food, let's eat. But please... keep it spicy!